Discreet-Romance.com
shopping cart Shopping Cart
order status Track Order
sign in Sign In
contact us Contact Us
    HOME       Search:     $$$ Return Customers Discount $$$ My Account  |  Checkout   
Adult Related News
Adult Toys Store  |   Sex Toy Reviews  |   Adult Articles  |   Sexuality Blog  |   Adult Community New!
Why Being Single In December Is Actually A Good Thing 00000E22
January 29, 2014 01:00 pm

While we're based in North America, AskMen has offices all over the world. When they produce awesome content of their own, sometimes we steal it. This article was originally published by AskMen UK -- so don't mind the repeated references to "pubs," "flats" and "gents," whatever those are. 

I LOVE Christmas. I love brandy butter and bread sauce and roast potatoes. I love a cold Boxing Day buffet. I love knackered family traditions that make no sense but would be sacrilege to break. I like churches and good cheer and the Frank Sinatra Christmas album. I like sitting with a highlighter pen and flicking through the Radio Times on 21 December , mapping out the following week. I like drinking an entire bottle of mint Baileys with my brother until we pass out on the sofa at around two am Boxing Day morning. I love buying presents. I take an entire day out and I dedicate it to Christmas cards. I am obsessed with David Bowie's duet with Bing Crosby. I know the Muppet Christmas Carol script off by heart. On particularly stressful days in high summer, I listened to Chris Rea's Driving Home For Christmas on repeat. Couples like to hog Christmas; they like to think its theirs, what with all their "checking in" at Winter Wonderland on Facebook and matching jumpers and Love f*cking Actually, a demented film with 50 flimsy narrative strands that tries to convince people that just about ANYTHING is better than being single, whether it's a cheating husband or a fiancée who doesn't speak the same language as you. Well, I've got some news, guys. It's NOT yours, Actually. Actually, it's ours. I'm sorry, but you get loads of festivities and Christmas is a brilliant holiday for us. It's the very best time of year to be single and here are the reasons why.Bloody mad datesDecember is the best month for dating. Firstly, there's a slightly Armageddon feeling about packing everything in before the year is over. People become obsessed with seeing each other or catching up "before Christmas" as if none of us are going to wake up on January 1st. Go to a club the Saturday night before Christmas and the stench of musk and pheromones is dizzying. They're all there to squeeze in one final hot fling before they get on a train to the arseendofnowhere-on-sea to spend a week with their family. I call this type of fling "The Christmas Special" and I urge you to commission one of your own this year. The mawkishness of Christmas also washes all of December in fairy-lit romance, making very ordinary dates feel really very magical . A few years ago I went on a date with a man who asked me to meet him under a giant Christmas tree in Covent Garden at the stroke of midnight. If a guy tried to pull this sort of charade off at any other time of year, I would have thought he was a class A, card-carrying nutter, but for some reason I found the whole thing enchanting, like we would be transported to the land of the sugar plum fairies. We 0000207E weren't in the end, we just had a few beers, but it was good fun nonetheless. Not having to hang out with your partner's mates on New Year’s EveNew Year's Eve is terrible. Always will be. Terrifically expensive, and so often disappointing. They're particularly bad if you're in a relationship and forced to spend it with your partner and all their friends. No matter how nice they are, they're just not your mates and come midnight, you'll wish you were with your best friend, throwing each other around a bit and singing Auld Lang Syne. Single New Year's Eves with single friends are the best it's going to get. There's a fantastic camaraderie between you all -- that no matter how terrible the evening gets, you're in it together. You're going to tackle this dreadful night (and the following year) head-on, side-by-side.

Continue Reading

(More)
What Does It Take For You To Ask A Woman Out?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Got a question about anything millennial-related? Email Ian at theianlang@gmail.com . You should also follow him on Twitter and like his page on Facebook .

Hey man,

I've read too little of what you wrote but I understand that you can give some advice. My problem is with girls. I'm 18 years old and I am afraid of talking to a girl. Now don't get me wrong, I can socialize with one and talk on different subjects and have a normal conversation but if I like the girl I can never ask her out.

I'm afraid of being rejected and afraid of being avoided by her after the rejection, that makes me get in the "friend zone.” But that happens only because I am the nice guy, there to listen to every problem and help them out whenever they want me to. I like being this way, because I think that's what caring about someone means. And my question to you is not how to talk to a girl or how to ask her out but rather how to get the courage to do it.

I want to ask you if you know a way of feeling more confident with myself. Like some sort of exercise, something I can do to boost my courage (don't tell me to practice it on a real situation since that's the thing I can't do).

I want to wake up one morning and get out there and ask that pretty girl out, of course I might be shaking and sweating but at least I managed to do it. Also a tip on how to handle rejection and the fact that after the rejection you might get avoided by that person (if you’ve known her for some time).

Long message, but I have no idea what else to try and who to ask, also excuse my English as I am not a native speaker.

Thanks in advance,

Sebastian

Depending on who you cite as a source, Sebastian here, at 18, may not qualify as a millennial in the strictest sense. I typically go by Strauss and Howe’s taxonomy, which defines millennials as those born between 1982 and 2004, which would include Sebastian. Even if you prefer the PwC/USC study that cuts it off at 1995, I think we can all agree that there’s plenty of millennial-ness to Sebastian’s email.

For millennials, “confidence” has been crammed down our throats our whole lives as a kind of magic bullet for whatever ails us. Confidence and its cousin, self-esteem, have always been treated as means to an end, rather than general indicators as to an individual’s overall well-being. Self-esteem is actually the more maligned of the two, and wrongly so. Pundits like to deride the “self-esteem training” of the '90s as the reason for the entitlement and softness you see in many adult millennials, and that’s not really the case. Self-esteem simply refers to the overall perception of one’s self, and I can’t see how letting a kid know that he’s an alright fella is a bad thing.

Confidence is an entirely different animal. Confidence is your ability to successfully execute a given task -- or, more accurately, your belief in your ability to execute said task. Obviously, that can vary from situation to situation. Sebastian, for instance, lacks confidence when it comes to asking girls out, but is confident in his ability to maintain platonic relationships. The problem with his question (and the concept of confidence in general) is right there in his email: He’s not asking me how to execute the task (asking a girl out), he’s asking me how he might go about getting the “confidence” to do so.

That’s the issue with confidence, at least in the way it’s been applied to my generation since childhood. When parents and teachers observed confidence in kids who were successful in school and in life, they kind of messed up the correlation between the two. Assuming confidence leads to success, they figured that the more confidence they could pump into us, the more successful we would be. Of course it’s impossible to systematically address confidence for every conceivable situation, and when you try to broaden confidence, you just end up with more self-esteem building. And truthfully, that isn’t an entirely bad thing. Higher self-esteem leads to higher courage, which is the ability to attempt something for which you don’t have confidence.

The truth that unravels the fallacy of confidence is that success breeds confidence, not the other way around, the way our parents and teachers tried to thrust it upon us. An NFL kicker is confident in his ability to make the PAT because he’s done it successfully hundreds of times. He’s accordingly less confident in his chances of making a 50-yard field goal, because he’s had less success from that range. The same concept applies to talking to women. Guys who are confident asking a girl out feel that way because they’ve successfully asked women out before. Every time someone says “yes,” that confidence grows in lockstep. I should point out that, in Sebastian’s case, no one really has that kind of confidence/experience at 18, so he shouldn’t feel alone.

Continue Reading

(More)
Admit It: You Wish You Could Have A Threesome
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

The threesome has been the ultimate goal for most men since the beginning of time. OK, perhaps that’s a stretch, but the idea of group sex (especially bringing in another woman to join you and your significant lady) is a fantasy for most men. And why wouldn’t it be? But if you want to kick the vanilla and see if you can manifest the threesome for yourself, there are a few things to keep in mind. It Takes A Certain Type This may seem painfully obvious, but threesomes are not for everyone. If your girlfriend is the type of woman who dreads experimenting with anal , fisting or anything that doesn’t involve the dictionary’s definition of heterosexual intercourse, then she probably won’t feel comfortable with the idea of bringing another party into your bedroom. Basically, you have to use your common sense here and really think about the person you are with and how a threesome might affect your relationship. Bringing a guest star into your relationship for the night can have major repercussions -- and if there isn't a strong, established and mutual respect and trust between you and your girlfriend, things will implode. If You Can’t Talk About It, You Can’t Do It One of the most important rules of group sex is being able to openly discuss it. I remember a friend of mine had been asked to join another couple for a threesome by the man when he was drunk. My friend was into the idea, but wasn’t sure if it would affect her friendship to the couple. I told her that she should just talk to both of them about it before they engaged in anything and she replied that she just couldn’t do it -- for the embarrassment factor. Stop. If you aren’t mature and confident enough to discuss the threesome, then you definitely aren’t mature or confident enough to have one. I’m not saying that the natural progression or spontaneity of an off-the-cuff orgy should be halted by a round-table discussion and a PowerPoint presentation, but if you're taking the route of planning this out, then you should be able to talk openly about it. How To Bring It Up The best way to bridge the conversation about having a threesome with your partner is not to just spring it while drunk and horny at a party. Jealousy (which, as I have said in the past, is just insecurity wearing a very ugly mask) is primed to flare up, and you have to tread with caution. I suggest discussing your fantasies. Ask her if she has any sexual fantasies she wants you to fulfill and then you can bring up yours. It’s  healthy, open discussion between partners that makes for the best sex. If you both know what you want, you can aim to please one another. Maybe her fantasy is to do a little DP with you and another man? You never know. You may have an interesting trade-off here, but you won’t know unless you discuss. Use language that lets her know she is still the main event: “I would love to see you with another woman.” The guest star is the sidebar; this is about you and her and making your sex that much more interesting. Make sure it’s very obvious that you want to see her happy as much as you want your own fantasy to become a reality. Lover Beware All the above aside, once the threesome actually happens, there are a few things that could result during the experience and in the aftermath. Your Jealousy: As much as you enjoy the thought in your head, if the two women pay too much attention to one another and enjoy the experience as you sit idly by and watch, you could get extremely jealous and start to mistrust your mate after it’s all done. Over-thinking the experience as it’s happening can ruin things, and you could potentially lose respect for her. Think about this beforehand.

Continue Reading

(More)
How Many Kids Should You Really Have?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Let me quickly solve one of the great questions of life: How many children should you have? Some parents of young ones secretly suspect that the optimal number is zero. Soon after my twin boys were born, my sister called to ask how things were going. “Well,” I said, probably splattered in vomit, but too exhausted to realize it, “if anyone thought they were going to be in this phase forever, they’d have to be a psycho to enjoy it.” I used to push the double stroller down the street, eyeing the childless people sprawled in front of cafés with envy and rage. It’s a feeling that Bryan Caplan, economist at George Mason University, must know. The poor guy is also the father of twins. As he writes in his book, Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids, “moderate foresight tells you to stop having kids. If one infant makes you tired and cranky, why have another?” Yet, Caplan goes on to say that moderate foresight is wrong. You shouldn’t extrapolate from the present moment forever. Today, he says, you might be living with “dirty diapers and lost sleep”. But that won’t last forever. Instead of moderate foresight, you should try full foresight . Rather than just obsessing about the next few years, you should work out how many kids you will want at every future stage of your life. Caplan explains: Suppose you’re 30. Selfishly speaking, you conclude that the most pleasant number of children to have during your 30s is one. During your 40s, your optimal number of kids will rise to two -- you’ll have more free time as your kids assert their independence. By the time you’re in your 50s, all your kids will be busy with their own lives. At this stage, wouldn’t it be nice to have four kids who periodically drop by? And so on. By your 60s, when you’ll probably have been forced out of work, you may well wish you’d had five kids just to raise the frequency of visits and grandchildren. And from your 70s onward, as you limp around in diapers rarely leaving the house, the more kids you had, the greater chance you have of anyone dropping by, ever. Caplan’s point: Take the average of the number of children that you’d want at the different ages of your life. In the above example, that average is about three, which is good news for me. Five years ago, when I already had three, my optimum number was one. Today my optimum is probably two. In other words, I’m nicely progressing along Caplan’s schema. Then I read in the paper about the Chinese film director Zhang Yimou, who has been fined $1.2 million for breaking China’s one-child policy. And he broke it big-time: not only did he have three kids with his wife Chen Ting, but Chinese reports online said he had fathered as many as seven children with a variety of women -- a figure that Zhang denies. However, this man is clearly pushing the Caplan theorem to the limit. If he lives to about 120, his strategy may not even be entirely insane.

Continue Reading

(More)
Here's The Right Way To Date Online
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Dear Ask Men, I was wondering if you could offer any wisdom on online personal ads. I’m not having a great deal of luck so far. Specifically, my questions are:1.    How brief or detailed should your descriptions of yourself and/or your ideal woman be?2.    When writing descriptions, should you stay away from trying to be funny? I’ve noticed that humor often doesn’t translate well in written form.Always appreciated, J. Dear J,We’ve been doing this a long time and it’s amazing how many questions we receive regarding tips about online dating . If feels as though pursuing a relationship online is the more accepted way to meet people these days. Even if two people do meet at a bar or at work, the courtship immediately moves to the tech world (texting , emailing, Facebook chatting). With regards to specifically meeting women on dating websites, we feel the best approach is oddly similar to scoring a new job -- treat your dating profile much as you would a professional resume. Always include a proper (and flattering) photo, double-check your spelling and grammar, refrain from discussing politics, religion, sex or any topic that would turn people off immediately, and unless you’re a professional comic, keep the profile as serious as possible. Now, we’re not advocating for the creation of the most snooze-inducing answers of all time, but you said it yourself -- humor doesn’t always translate. Be brief, but direct; brag about the areas in which you excel and omit any unattractive dating career highlights ; and always act in a courteous manner to every potential connection. It’s fine to describe the type of woman you’re interested in dating, but explaining your “ideal” woman in too much detail might keep a lot of women from being interested or responding to your messages. If she doesn’t match all, or any, of the traits you consider “ideal,” then why should she bother? Truth be told, you could meet a woman tomorrow who matches none of your ideal traits, but if the connection is there, you’re not goin 000039A1 g to care in the least about your checklist of “must-haves.”

Continue Reading

(More)
Check Out The New Dating App That Puts The Date First
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Introducing AskMen Dating -- Putting the Date First.

AskMen has partnered with mobile dating app HowAboutWe to launch AskMen Dating  to get you offline, to the real date, the real person, and the real moment more quickly.

Sign up and take part in one of the easiest (and most fun) online dating experiences around. The site asks the question for you: "How about we..." and you fill in the blank with an idea for a date. It's free to sign up and post date ideas, and offers additional features for users who sign up for a paid membership. 

HowAboutWe is such a great dating platform that it made it easy for AskMen to partner with them on AskMen Dating. HowAboutWe has become one of the fastest-growing online dating companies, recently surpassing 1.7 million users, and is now available in 15 languages across 30 countries. 

If you’re single and looking for something fun to do, don’t waste any more time and sign up right here.  

Get started with AskMen Dating today!

Continue Reading

(More)
It Turns Out There Are Such Things As The Laws Of Attraction
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Reader's QuestionDear AskMen, I've met "the one " but I'm having trouble making her realize this. I've been pursuing her for about five months while she was away at college, but we kept in regular contact, at first through email and then over the phone. I've gotten the sense she's very guarded about relationships. On a couple occasions, it felt as though things were moving forward, only to have her backpedal. She specifically said that she thought the relationship could have evolved into something, but it hasn't, and she wasn't sure why. At this moment, she says she doesn't believe it will. We remain close friends . I've told her I'm going to pursue this. She wants to spend time together, but only as friends. My question is this: Can you help me turn this relationship into something more? Thanks, B. ResponseDear B., I'm saying the following as a pseudo-friend, given our circumstances, and as a man that has lived through your exact situation more than a few times in my life. Forget her . First, let's touch on the absurd concept of "the one." There are millions of married people in the around the world. Imagine being able to ask them all the same question -- "Are you married to 'the one?'" A majority will answer yes. The rest will respond with a variation of no that sounds like "She was 'the one,' but things are different now" or "I thought she was 'the one,' but I was wrong" or maybe even "I was married to a woman I thought was 'the one,' but she wasn't, but now I'm married to 'the one.'" Ask Larry King and he'll tell you he's had seven different women in the role of "the one" in his lifetime. I'm sorry to report to the millions of single men and women across the world, and all the hopeless romantics, relationship experts, Nora Ephron junkies and the single-and-searching -- but their concept of a soul mate, of one person made specifically for them, is a fiction. If this were true, how would it be possible for millions of people to meet “the one” specific to them alone? What the hell are the odds? "I met the one! She also lives in Seattle and gets coffee at the Starbucks at 8:23 every morning! What great luck!"

Continue Reading

(More)
So You Finally Want Kids. But She Doesn't. Wait, What?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

What would you do if after several years dating you discovered that the love of your life isn’t interested in children -- especially when you see a future as a family man? If she’s more than content remaining a childless couple and not continuing the gene pool, what options do you have? Do you stick with her and hope she changes her mind -- or break things off? We look at the choices men should contemplate if dealing with this important dilemma. How Soon Should You Discuss Kids?Some psychologists have suggested discussing the issue of reproduction early on in a relationship. In one book, the writer even advises raising the subject after just three dates. Dr. Helen Nightingale, clinical psychologist and therapist in London, stresses that the subject is “one of the most important life issues you’re ever going to face” and emphasizes the need for a guy to do some serious thinking about what he wants in life. “Choosing whether you want to breed is probably one of the most serious life issues you will ever deal with,” says Dr. Nightingale. “If marriage is in the cards but it’s suddenly going to be no kids -- and you’re taken aback by that -- then you obviously haven’t asked the right questions in terms of entering into a relationship.” Dexter, 37, is facing such a scenario now. “I’ve been with my girlfriend Tamsin for eight years. She’s a year older and I feel the biological clock is ticking away . At the moment she’s keen on marriage, but not on the idea of having kids. I’m just hoping that she’ll come round to the idea. I love her but want a family as well.” RisksDr. Petra Boynton, social psychiatrist at University College London, believes that a guy should tread carefully when airing his feelings from the start. “It could be quite off-putting to bring up the issue so soon. Because whether you’re saying you want them or you never want to have them, it’s saying to the person that you’re dating that you’re thinking about this in relation to them. And that could scare them off.” Dr. Boynton certainly doesn’t agree about having a set time to bring the issue up. “If you’re saying on Date No. 3 that you never want to have kids, well, that’s as full-on as saying that you would love to have kids.” Listen To Your PartnerSo imagine you’ve been dating for months and the situation gets serious. The subject of children comes up over a drink, and she says she has no intention of having kids . What are the options that won’t necessarily mean finishing the relationship? Dr. Boynton believes in talking honestly about the situation and the future together. 

Continue Reading

(More)
Are You Single Because You're Just Not Getting Noticed?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Do you ever feel like the invisible man, only, y’know, without all the bandages and the decidedly old-fashioned raincoat? Yes, us too. After all, whether we’re talking about friends, colleagues or members of the fairer sex, we all like to get a little attention from time to time. But it’s not always that easy to get noticed, so what can the average guy do to stand out from the crowd? Join us as we consult the experts to find out how to attract attention from the opposite sex. Why Is Getting Noticed Important? If you want to make yourself a success, you’re going to have to stand out from the crowd once in a while. Sure, being part of the herd feels safe, but you’re going to have to stick your neck out to get anywhere in life. Of course that’s easier said than done. Statistics from Match.com ’s Annual Survey of Canadian Singles shows that 68% of men questioned would describe themselves as ‘introverted’ -- hardly the greatest starting point for meeting women. But confidence breeds confidence, and if men want to attract more women, then they’re going to have to do something about it. “Most men feel under appreciated both at work and at home,” says relationship expert Nicole McCance . “They crave acknowledgement. They want to feel important, that they are doing a good job and that they are needed. It boils down to the survival of the fittest; men want to be the guy in the room that everyone is looking at.” “Attention is like an ego-boosting currency,” says pick-up artist Angel Donovan from Dating Skills Review . “It nurtures and supports the ego and self esteem of those who get good measures of it. It can make them feel and act more confident.” How To Get Noticed More “One of the keys to getting noticed is to exude confidence. Men tend to gravitate towards confident women and it’s not very different the other way around.” says Kimberly Moffit, Match.com’s Canadian relationship insider. “Simple changes in body language, like standing up straight, uncrossing your arms and making eye contact will make a man appear more confident and approachable.” “Smile!” advises Nicole McCance. “You also won’t get noticed if you are hiding in the crowd. Put down your phone, and notice the people around you. Start making eye contact. Approaching a woman is the best way for her to notice you. There are so many wonderful men who are going home single because they didn’t take the plunge and smile, walk up to a woman and introduce themselves.” Making the first move should be a no-brainer for any man. After all, how’s anyone going to notice you if you don’t take the plunge? But it’s not all about the size of your social cojones; there are other things you can do to help you stand out. Sprucing yourself up is certainly one of them. Research from Match.com shows that poor hygiene is the biggest turnoff for 74% of women, whilst a whopping 85% point to style as an important trait in a mate. That doesn’t mean you have to rush out and buy an expensive suit, however. In fact, the same survey showed that women preferred the casual look (57%). But whether you’re dressed to the nines or wearing some jeans and a T-shirt, it’s clear that first impressions count; indeed, 46% of Canadian women say that they know within 15 minutes if they are going to like a guy. It’s not all about how you look, however; how you act is important too. “Fun attracts attention,” states Angel Donovan. “So forget about trying to get noticed and remember that the more fun you have, the more you get noticed.” Kimberly Moffit advises men to let go and try to be them 00001410 selves. “Be authentic,” she says. “Let your personality shine. Women will pick up on your sincerity and want to get to know you.”

Continue Reading

(More)
Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

It's long been believed that nice guys finish last -- especially when it comes to the opposite sex. The typical “bad boy” is a popular choice among even the most intelligent of females, but the reason for a woman’s attraction to a guy who is so obviously good for nothing but casual sex is often unfathomable, even to the woman herself.Bad boys come in many different forms, according to Lucia, a syndicated relationship columnist and host of the The Art of Love. “Some bad boys are players and are just interested in getting as many notches on their belt as possible,” Lucia revealed. “Others want to date the woman but are too selfish, immature or damaged in some way to be in a successful relationship. Finally, there are the guys who are just not that into a woman.”So why are women constantly attracted to men who just don’t seem like the type of man to eventually settle down and raise a family? The blame could be her own biology betraying her.Born to Date Bad?In 2012, a study by the University of Texas shed some light on the appeal of bad boys. In a statement explaining the findings of their research, a university spokesperson said that previous research has shown that in the week prior to ovulation, women become attracted to  “sexy, rebellious and handsome men” and this study hoped to shed light on why this was the case. The researchers asked a group of women to view online dating profiles during periods of both high and low fertility. Some of the profiles displayed the answers of attractive men with typical “bad boy” tendencies while the remaining profiles featured average-looking men who would make for very reliable partners. The women were asked to indicate the “expected paternal contribution” from each of the men and how helpful each of the men would be in areas such as “caring for the baby, shopping for food, cooking and contributing to household chores.” The closer to ovulation the women were, the more they thought that the “bad boy” would make a better domestic partner.While science is a good indicator of behavior, psychology is usually involved as well. Lucia feels the female attraction to bad boys is best explained by the same human response that keeps Vegas casinos in business. The term is positive partial reinforcement, or PPR, and it’s a psychological reaction where the reward is not granted every time the desired action is taken. PPR is the cornerstone of places like Las Vegas and other casinos. People gamble because they’re rewarded at random intervals. If they were never rewarded, there would be no reason to gamble and if they were always rewarded, they would get bored of constantly winning. PPR is the calling card of a bad boy.

Continue Reading

(More)
Are You In A Manipulative Relationship?
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

Having influence over another individual in a relationship isn’t always a bad thing. For example, a woman can have a positive effect on her partner in the areas of health, hygiene and overall appearance. She may influence her partner to make smarter nutritional choices, incorporate skincare products into his morning routine and buy clothing that accentuates his build and stature. There is, however, a fine line between influence and psychological manipulation. Psychological manipulation aims to change the behavior of another individual using devious, deceptive or sometimes even abusive tactics. Oftentimes, manipulative behavior can initially appear to be something positive, and is mistaken for another attribute, such as assertiveness.“Assertiveness is a kind of strident independence and open voice,” reveals Dr. Wendy Walsh, relationship expert and author of  The 30-Day Love Detox . Manipulation is using tactics to get you to do something you don’t want to do. It may involve subtle threats of abandonment or playing the victim card. People who are good communicators don’t need to use manipulative tactics. They can easily explain their feelings and negotiate compromises.While it’s difficult to describe specific manipulative behavior in a partner, it’s never too late to try to affect some positive changes. Here are some tips on how to determine if you’re involved with a manipulative partner, the best reactions to manipulative behavior, the power of one simple word and signs that it might be best to end a manipulative relationship. How To Recognize Manipulative BehaviorThe signs of manipulation aren’t always easy to spot, especially early on in a relationship. Also, it’s not always obvious you’re being manipulated. It may just feel like you’re doing things to make your partner happy, even if those requests make you unhappy. A popular manipulative ploy is passive-aggressive behavior. “Passive aggressive behavior is when someone’s actions don’t match their words.” explains Dr. Walsh. “For instance, she says she doesn’t mind you having boy’s nights out, but every time you do, she has a sudden personal emergency complete with tears that needs your undivided attention.”Now, it is possible that there could be an actual issue, but if a pattern develops that constantly disrupts any plans that don’t involve her, she’s probably being manipulative. Interactions with a manipulator often leave others feeling obligated and guilty -- to downright scared -- not do what is asked of them. A manipulator uses other tactics, besides passive-aggressive behavior, to elicit these feelings. Common warning signs or “tricks” include: the use of tears to get their way, an excessive use of charm, a heavy dose of guilt if things don’t favor the manipulator, and flat-out lying just to get what they want in any situation.

Continue Reading

(More)
5 Things Men Need To Learn About Women
January 27, 2014 01:00 pm

This post was originally published on James Michael Sama's blog .He is a writer, blogger, social media marketer and on air/live event host based in Boston, Mass.Sure, we have all met some women who seem to be more complicated than Chinese algebra. Even the famous Oscar Wilde remarked: Women are meant to be loved, not understood.But, I do think that as men, we over-complicate women because we expect them to be just like us. It’s natural for anyone to project their own qualities onto others and become confused when they don’t fit the mold, but once we step outside of ourselves and see people as they are, and not as we are, our vision becomes clearer.It doesn’t matter what you say, it matters how she feels.A woman’s honesty to herself is unparalleled, because her self-esteem is rooted where it should be, in herself. You can call her beautiful or sexy or gorgeous every single day, but if she doesn’t feel it, it won’t get through to her.You need to make her feel all of these things, and more. In fact, what you don’t say usually matters more than what you do say. As the saying goes, actions speak louder than words.You work on logic, she works on emotion.This is not to say that women are illogical or don’t use logic in every day situations -- often their thoughts and ideas are better articulated than their male counterparts'. The point I’m trying to make here is that a woman’s emotions will influence her actions more than a man’s would for him.As men, society teaches us to keep our feelings hidden, so we don’t acknowledge them as much, and therefore don’t act on them as women do.It has always been seen as a negative for a man to be in touch with his ‘feminine side,’ but when people say this, they’re typically referring to someone who is more in touch with his own emotions. Women will naturally gravitate closer to men like this, because they feel they will be better understood.(Hint: Women, this also means if you want your man to know how you feel about something, you need to tell him. He may not be able to read it on his own).Women don’t compartmentalize.Meaning, if a man has a bad day at work, he can come home, give his woman a kiss, pour himself a drink, and (usually) unwind -- blocking out the stress until the next day (assuming his work doesn’t come home with him).If a woman has a bad day, it will affect her mood, and her interactions. This is exactly the time when men need to shut up and not tell her to ‘get over it’ or that it’s ‘not a big deal’ because these things stay fresh in her mind. Be understanding, be comforting, and she will feel better.What women want isn’t that complicated.It’s always a mystery what women want in a relationship… or is it?Believe it or not, gentlemen, women are humans too.This means they crave the same things that you do, deep down, but probably won’t admit.They want to be loved, respected, trusted, and adored. They want you to listen, at least make an attempt to understand, and help where you can. They’re not nearly as complicated as you think -- so don’t make it worse than it is.She is more afraid of rejection than you are.I know man, trust me. I’ve been rejected probably more than the average guy. I know how much it sucks and how hard it is to put all of that risk on the table when approaching a woman.But, a woman’s desire is to be desired. Every societal norm, whether you agree with it or not, shows her that she is to be pursued.Are you waiting for her to make the first move? Stop.Can you imagine the blow to self-esteem when you are the object of desire, being made to feel undesirable?

Continue Reading

(More)
What To Get Your Girlfriend For The Hol 00004000 idays
January 22, 2014 01:00 pm

The time of year has once again come when men must open their hearts and wallets to express how much they love and care for their significant others. Whether you like it or not, you need to get your girl something, and, lucky for you, we've gone and done the legwork to find a range of gifts that will satisfy even the most fickle of femmes.But what if you've only been dating for two weeks -- should you get her jewelry? And if you've been together for over a year, how much money is enough to show her you love her?All these questions will soon be answered, as we took the liberty of compiling a list of gifts for different stages in a relationship .Cold Picnic WatchDesigned by a husband-and-wife duo in Brooklyn, Cold Picnic's watches are like no other with their natural leather straps lathered with bright paint, adding pops of color to the watches' minimalist design. No one will have one just like it.$110 at Need Supply Co. Comme Des Garçons WalletA great accessory always goes a long way, especially if it's Comme Des Garcons. No but really, a great wallet like this one , with it's rich red and luxury design, is something she'll be able to keep for a long time.%displayPrice% at %seller% Michael Kors WatchMichael Kors continuously nails it with his women's line of watches with a mix of statement pieces and more classic models. This one leans more on the classic side with its simple chronograph dial, yet oozes luxury styles with the combination of dark royal blue, gold and silver.%displayPrice% at %seller% Giles & Bro. Archer BangleGiles & Bro.'s Archer Bangle, much like Miansai's cuff, will go great with anything and yet, is a standout piece with its unique links and simple design. It's a piece she'll be wearing everyday, with everything. %displayPrice% at %seller% Fujifilm XF1 CamerasAnother product that joins fashion and technology, Fujifilm's new XF1 compact camera takes cues from vintage cameras while packing in a ton of features.%displayPrice%at %seller%

Continue Reading

(More)
What To Get Your Girlfriend For The Hol 00000B08 idays
January 20, 2014 01:00 pm

The time of year has once again come when men must open their hearts and wallets to express how much they love and care for their significant others. Whether you like it or not, you need to get your girl something, and, lucky for you, we've gone and done the legwork to find a range of gifts that will satisfy even the most fickle of femmes.But what if you've only been dating for two weeks -- should you get her jewelry? And if you've been together for over a year, how much money is enough to show her you love her?All these questions will soon be answered, as we took the liberty of compiling a list of gifts for different stages in a relationship .Cold Picnic WatchDesigned by a husband-and-wife duo in Brooklyn, Cold Picnic's watches are like no other with their natural leather straps lathered with bright paint, adding pops of color to the watches' minimalist design. No one will have one just like it.$110 at Need Supply Co. Comme Des Garçons WalletA great accessory always goes a long way, especially if it's Comme Des Garcons. No but really, a great wallet like this one , with it's rich red and luxury design, is something she'll be able to keep for a long time.%displayPrice% at %seller% Michael Kors WatchMichael Kors continuously nails it with his women's line of watches with a mix of statement pieces and more classic models. This one leans more on the classic side with its simple chronograph dial, yet oozes luxury styles with the combination of dark royal blue, gold and silver.%displayPrice% at %seller% Giles & Bro. Archer BangleGiles & Bro.'s Archer Bangle, much like Miansai's cuff, will go great with anything and yet, is a standout piece with its unique links and simple design. It's a piece she'll be wearing everyday, with everything. %displayPrice% at %seller% Fujifil 000020FC m XF1 CamerasAnother product that joins fashion and technology, Fujifilm's new XF1 compact camera takes cues from vintage cameras while packing in a ton of features.%displayPrice%at %seller%

Continue Reading

(More)
Yes, It's True. Dating Is Over. So What's Next?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

I had more sex in 2013 than I have ever had in any year prior. Looking back as this year winds down, I have learned something new that has fundamentally changed the way I'm going to pursue a relationship in the next year. I didn't date. I hung out. I showed up. I went out. I paid attention. I never thought I would say this, but dating as I knew it may, in fact, be over -- no matter how old you are. But the good news, is that does not mean romance is over. It just means it's found wandering down a path that differs from the one laid out by the likes of Matthew McConaughey and Hugh Grant throughout a slew of cheesy 'rom-coms.' The formula of a "meet cute," followed by date, followed by potential pitfall, then sex and ultimately grand realization of love is not quite how things work. Their playbook is a myth and I am done believing it.Look. -- I'm a romantic. Not long ago, I still held on to some pretty traditional notions of dating. Pick a girl up, take her to dinner and do all the things you would likely have seen in some '90s romantic comedy. Given my passion for happy endings and Christmas movies, this seemed like the right route; and it did lead to some fun and, ultimately, some relationships. But like anything else in the world of social interaction, things change and we start seeing new personalities emerge and new trends in behavior. You have to adapt if you want to stay in the game. So this year, I adapted.Earlier this year, I started my dating path with conventional dates with a few contenders. I went through the motions and I began the whole endeavor with that same "classic" dating vibe. Not long into the second date each time, something started to become clear. This was a rare occurrence for her. The fact that I had picked her up and chosen the restaurant, opened the door for her at every pass and paid the bill made her feel like this was the beginning of a unique courtship. It made her feel so special that the spontaneous casual nature of any date flew right out the window -- along with the cash in my wallet for dinners. I was surprised to see her reading so much into a second date with a lovely meal as more than just "dating." Then I realized she was 100% right. These were grand gestures, by today's standards.I hated to admit it, but my traditional ways of dating had started to become so unheard-of in my circles that, whereas at first I wore it as a badge of honor, I started to see that I was overdoing it. Between all the new ways that men and women meet, following up with the proverbial "date" began to carry a slight "knight-in-shining-armor" vibe about it. And I am no knight. I am not sure what the hell I want yet, but I do love the company of fun and sexy women. I realized I needed to shift gears if I wanted to enjoy their company without purporting that I was beginning a grand romance from the get-go.

Continue Reading

(More)
You're Evolving, Right? Then Why Does She Miss The Old You?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

Men in long-term relationships and marriages , this one's for you. Take a moment to look back at those long-ago days when you first got together with your wife or girlfriend. You were both younger, maybe you weighed less, maybe you had more hair. "She was hot back then!" you think to yourself, with satisfaction. "She's still hot," you remind yourself, acknowledging that she might not necessarily be hot in the same way, but still. What was it like back then? "We went out more," you recall. "We used to go out big! Remember that one birthday of mine? Holy sh*t, that was crazy. We ended up walking all the way home at dawn 'cause we couldn't find a cab. And she was barefoot because she got tired of walking in heels. SO MANY Jägerbombs that night, good God." Ah, memories. She has memories, too. Ever wonder what they're like? She remembers the same events as you do, but she probably remembers them a little differently. The main difference is probably you. You've changed, pal! You both have, sure. But there are things about the old you that she misses, and she's probably too considerate to tell you about them. She might not even think about them very often. But as we all know, the best husbands and boyfriends are mind-readers, so here's your cheat sheet.  You Wanted To Spend Time With Her Before Anyone Else In the early days of your relationship, time with your lady was your top priority, because things were fresh and exciting and you were very likely to get a blowjob at reasonably regular intervals. In terms of competing with your friends, she won, every time. Years later, that is no longer true. It makes sense; you live together. You brush your teeth beside her every morning in the bathroom mirror. But there are times when she misses the feeling of being the person at the pinnacle of your social pyramid. For proof, just once make a show of blowing off an opportunity to hang out with your buddies and ask her if she'd like to do something one-on-one. She will love it. You will have conjured the old you from the mists of time, and she will think you're a magician. You Lectured Less What, me lecture? Why The Kia Sportage Was A Wise And Cunning Purchase. Why Everyone Was Mad At Lance Armstrong For The Wrong Reasons. Why Vinyl Siding Is A Horrible Building Material For Your Geographic Region. Why Being An Eagles Fan Is Fundamentally Different Than Being A Falcons Fan, Parts 1 Through 4. "That's called talking!" you protest. Yes, it's you talking, and she's listening. Or is she? Does it matter? Haha, that's a joke -- or course it matters! The difference between lecturing and conversing is that in a conversation , each person's point of view is sought and a friendly debate ensues. After a bunch of years together, you probably think you already know her opinion on most things. And maybe you do! But sometimes a mysterious thing happens over the course of a conversation, an alchemical reaction wherein someone's thoughts evolve and they say something unexpected -- it may surprise even them. As long as you're the only one talking, that's never going to happen. Ask her what she thinks next time! Again, the old you, all hot and young, will appear before her eyes. She'll probably get flustered.  You Made Fewer Nighttime Noises This one's pretty straightforward, and, unfortunately, there's not a whole lot you can do about it -- at least not that I know of. This is one of those times when she's just going to have to suck it up, and she knows this, but it won't make her stop daydreaming about the days before she knew about the other definition of "Dutch oven." 

Continue Reading

(More)
Get Out Of Your Manipulative Relationship
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

Having influence over another individual in a relationship isn’t always a bad thing. For example, a woman can have a positive effect on her partner in the areas of health, hygiene and overall appearance. She may influence her partner to make smarter nutritional choices, incorporate skin care products into his morning routine and buy clothing that accentuate his build and stature.  There is, however, a fine line between influence and psychological manipulation. Psychological manipulation aims to change the behavior of another individual using devious, deceptive, or sometimes even abusive tactics. Often times, manipulative behavior appears as if it’s something positive, ans id mistaken for another attribute such as assertiveness.“Assertiveness is a kind of strident independence and open voice,” reveals Dr. Wendy Walsh, relationship expert and author of  The 30-Day Love Detox Manipulation is using tactics to get you to do something you don’t want to do. It may involve subtle threats of abandonment or playing the victim card. People who are good communicators don’t need to use manipulative tactics. They can easily explain their feelings and negotiate compromises.While it’s difficult to describe specific manipulative behavior in a partner, it’s never too late to try to affect some positive changes. Here are some tips on how to determine if you’re involved with a manipulative partner, the best reactions to manipulative behavior, the power of one simple word and signs that it might be best to end a manipulative relationship. How To Recognize Manipulative BehaviorThe signs of manipulation aren’t always easy to spot, especially early on in a relationship. Also, it’s not always obvious you’re being manipulated. It may just feel like you’re doing things to make your partner happy, even if those requests make you unhappy. A popular manipulative ploy is passive-aggressive behavior. “Passive aggressive behavior is when someone’s actions don’t match their words.” explains Dr. Walsh. “For instance, she says she doesn’t mind you having boy’s nights out, but every time you do, she has a sudden personal emergency complete with tears that needs your undivided attention.”Now, it is possible that there could be an actual issue, but if a pattern develops that constantly disrupts any plans that don’t involve her, she’s being manipulative. Interactions with a manipulator often leaves others feeling obligated and guilty to downright scared to not do what is asked of them. A manipulator uses other tactics, besides passive-aggressive behavior, to elicit these feelings. Common warning signs or “tricks” include -- the use of tears to get their way, an excessive use of charm, a heavy dose of guilt if things don’t favor the manipulator and flat-out lying just to get what they want in any situation.

Continue Reading

(More)
Things Have Worked Out Well So Far. But Is She A Keeper?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

How do you know if a woman is “the one”? From Dear Abby to Dan Savage, this question is asked so often, and by so many generations of men, there should be an easy answer by now. Unfortunately, there isn’t a simple answer to anything in life, but there are ways (sometimes several) to decipher if the woman you’re dating is a keeper.These are not tests she’ll unknowingly take and there is no trickery involved like waiting to see if she offers to pay on the first date or judging her based on what she orders on a date. These also aren’t physical attributes -- like an amazing body or perfect smile. These are unquestionable signs that this woman is the person you want around for the better and for the worse.From her demeanor when no one is around to her reaction to your obsession with fantasy sports or obsession with RPGs, these are questions to ask yourself about the woman you’re dating. You may know the answers to some of these questions without even reading the description, which is great for her, but even better for you. You may need to really think about the answer to some of these questions. Take your time to consider if she’s really the one -- this is not a decision to be made in haste.Here are five ways to figure out if she’s a keeper:Does She Understand Your Inner Circle?There is a common myth in dating that a woman must get along with your family and friends to be “the one.” This just isn’t the case. She doesn’t have to be loved by all and love everyone in your life -- they just all have to get along. She doesn’t have to be a best friend to your best friend, she only has to understand your bond. Her and mom don’t have to text message every day to swap stories, they just have to get through dinner without stabbing each other with dull butter knives.If she respects your bond with friends and family, gets along with some, but doesn’t quite connect with others, it’s fine. The only real connection to concern yourself with is between the two of you.Does She Encourage Your Interests, Even If She Doesn’t Get Them?Every year, you and friends gather to do what men will do -- whether it’s canoeing down a river to camp for a weekend or dressing up like the cast of Watchmen and road-tripping around to Comic-Con. If she’s also interested in fantasy baseball or keeping a sketch journal of all the food you eat, that’s fantastic. However, if these interests  aren’t in her wheelhouse, but she encourages you to be passionate about creative endeavors, she’s a perfect fit. It’s fine if she doesn’t understand, and it’s also acceptable if she doesn’t really want to understand, just so long as she doesn’t discourage those interests for any reason.

Continue Reading

(More)
What Worries You The Most About Having Kids?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

Becoming a parent is one of few things in life that can bring unbridled joy to just about anyone. However, some parents -- probably more than we know -- are actually terrified about becoming parents for the first time. Here at AskMen, we wanted to know exactly how our readers felt about the possibility of becoming a new parent, so we asked: What worries you the most about having kids? Here are a few of the best answers for you.Having Kids // // Having Kids Facebook Post by AskMen.com .

Continue Reading

(More)
Why Your Kids Will Always Be Happier Than You
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

My 7-year-old daughter now gets a daily newspaper delivered. It’s written for kids, undoubtedly subsidized by the French state, and every evening when I walk into our Paris apartment she shouts at me, “Did you get my paper from the mailbox?!” If I’ve remembered, she grabs it from my hand and does a celebratory war dance around the kitchen. I mean, I like newspapers too, but my pleasure at getting hold of them isn’t quite so unconfined. Or take my 5-year-old son. When I collect him from tennis class, before I can even say hello, he bursts straight into a minutes-long monologue along the lines of, “And it was ten-ten and den I won and da coach said I won!” What bewilders me, in both cases, is their sheer joy. It’s like a cocaine high. I remember feeling it as a child. I can see myself as an 8-year-old, waiting outside the soccer ground with all my teammates and our poor dads at 7:50 a.m. on a freezing Saturday, all of us (except the dads) rattling the gates impatiently until that blissful moment when the grumpy old janitor would come limping out of his house and unlock the gates of paradise. Then we’d play a game, and sometimes I’d score. Decades later, I can still remember some of those goals as vividly as if I were watching them now on YouTube. It’s not only childish joy that you can never recapture as an adult. It’s also childish pain. Shortly before his death in 2008, the curmudgeonly old English playwright Simon Gray published the final volume of his “Smoking Diaries,” The Last Cigarette. It recounts the time he was lying in bed in his dormitory at boarding school aged 9, being lectured by a teacher for having peed on the toilet seat and floor. Every other boy in the dorm was listening. Gray felt shame. Now, as an elderly playwright in New York, a different incident has made him feel shame again. But, he writes: "I’m not saying that I felt last night as I felt 60-odd years ago when I hid under the bedclothes, in fact the fact is that though I can identify such feelings, mortification, embarrassment, etc., they’re not really feelings in the old sense of the word, in the days when I had feelings I could feel, they’re more like reminiscences of feelings, they’re so faint and thinned out, and I cared far more about having my cigarette than I did about my shame." That’s right. From middle age onward, most of us don’t have feelings anymore. Reminiscences of feelings are about the best we can manage. The closest I usually get to joy these days is a sense of vague contentment, or painlessness, e.g. when I’m alone in a café with a coffee and a newspaper and nobody is crying or shouting at me. There’s an obvious policy lesson for parents here. Since children’s feelings -- of both pleasure and pain -- are so much stronger than ours, we should prioritize them over our own. They are people, and we are shadows.

Continue Reading

(More)
The Dos And Don'ts Of Being In A Relationship In Your 20s
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

This article was originally published on Elite Daily .Congratulations! You have successfully navigated through the treacherous waters of dating and are now in a full-fledged relationship. You have accomplished something so few were able to before you. Now that you have managed to get yourself into a relationship, you can’t help but think: Now what?Are things going to change now that you are officially dating? Should they change? Or should you keep acting the same way you have been? The biggest mistake people make when entering into new relationships is letting the pressure of a new title get to their heads. Think about it. Literally nothing has changed except you now refer to each other as girlfriend or boyfriend.Chances are before you decided to make it official, people around you figured you were dating anyway. Don’t fall into t 000028D0 his trap and self-sabotage your own relationship.How do you know what you should and should not be doing? Take a look below.Do: Have Date NightIt’s easy to get caught up with your social scene, but you need to remember you are also in a relationship. You don’t need to be going out every single night and blacking out if you have a boy/girlfriend.This is just another benefit of being in a relationship -- you always have someone else to do something else with. You are going to be able to spend a lot more quality time when the setting is just the two of you as opposed to a huge group at a bar.Don’t: Bombard Social Media With Your PhotosGag me. If you were so secure in your relationship, why do you need to flaunt it on every social media platform?The truth is that no one cares about your romantic getaway or the kissy faces you two are making at each other. Do everyone a favor and just keep those pictures on your nightstand. Do: Split The CheckIf you are in a full-fledged relationship, the obligation of the guy paying for every meal can go right out the window. You are in an equal partnership, so it’s okay to split the check or take turns alternating who is going to pay the bill.It’s nice to switch it up and it more than alleviates some of the guy’s responsibility. Remember you’re both young and you’ve both got bills to pay! Don’t: Text Their FriendsThis is just creepy and weird and may even be considered crossing the line. This just looks sketchy on your part. The only time this is even acceptable is if it’s about buying your significant other a gift or planning a special date. There’s no reason to engage in petty banter -- remember these are their friends, not yours.Do: Be Honest About Your IntentionsIf you don’t see a future with this person, you need to be upfront and honest about it. The worst thing you can do is get into a relationship with someone you have no intentions of taking seriously.Don’t just get into a partnership for the sake of it. If that is what you’re doing, fine, but you need to tell the other person.

Continue Reading

(More)
Are You Settling Because You're Afraid Of Being Alone?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

We all know the holiday season can be lonely if you aren’t coupled up. If you’re not following these simple tricks , you might have grabbed someone just because you think it’s better than being alone. Bad idea. But now, at least, science has given you an excuse. Researchers from the University of Toronto concluded in the December edition of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology that “fear of being single is a meaningful predictor of settling for less in relationships.” The anxiety, concern and distress associated with being alone causes us to cave on our standards and go for people that aren’t good for us. And that doesn’t mean you should be holding out for Megan Fox or Bar Refaeli (you can vote for your favorite celebri-lady here ). The study interviewed men and women aged 18 to 59 in all types of relationship situations. Researchers put the respondents through a series of tests to create a “Fear of Being Single Scale” that allowed the scientists to measure men and women’s relationship fears contrasted with their idea of an ideal mate. Higher scores on the Fear of Being Single scale predicted greater dependence on less satisfying relationships. Those who scored highest tended to have low self-esteem and were overly anxious. “Anxious attachment tends to be marked by chronic neediness and clinginess with attachment figures and chronic fear of rebuff and rejection,” explains the study’s authors. You’re not that guy, are you?Originally, the myth was that women were more motivated by loneliness to date or marry people they don’t really like, but now we have proof that men do the same thing. “Loneliness is a painful experience for both men and women, so it’s not surprising that the fear of being single seems not to discriminate on the basis of gender,” said co-author Geoff MacDonald to the Huffington Post .One of the major reasons being single is so rough today is due to our society’s way of shaming those who don’t get married -- something that works, judging by the still-very-high number of marriages today. But don’t forget, being single can be pretty great . Although the study was the first quantified study of its kind, we all probably saw this coming. Relationship specialist Dr. J.R. Bruns, M.D., co-author of The Tiger Woods Syndrome, a book about repairing relationships, explained in Psychology Today that men sometimes settle for women who do things like put them on “short leashes” because they are obsessed with not being alone and also because they just want to be in a sexual relationship. Men “bury their needs, feelings and goals to accommodate their mate's,” writes Bruns. “They surrender unconditionally due to their natural desire for sex and their fear of being alone. They would rather be in a poor relationship than no relationship.”So before you think about settling, value your own needs and -- to quote The 40 Year-Old Virgin -- don't put her "on a pedestal.” It's one thing to accommodate your mate, but you should never give up doing what you like and acting like yourself just to avoid that feeling of loneliness.If she’s not right for you, just move on. Wasting your time in a relationship that doesn't make you feel truly happy is only going to hurt both of you.

Continue Reading

(More)
Is A Toy Really Going To Replace You In Her Bed?
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

Above is the exclusive first look at Promescent's hilarious commercial, directed by Greg Grunberg. Our writer, Bobby Box, tried out Promescent and other sex products -- he kindly volunteered, in the name of journalism, to have lots and lots of sex so he could report back about the best products to enhance your sexual experiences. Thank you, Bobby. Read on for his experiences.This month, I received several packages from the most reputable sex toy companies around the world. This was so I could recommend the best of the best for both you and your partner on behalf of AskMen, which I had absolutely no qualms about doing. The following is my sexual Toy Story. Which, like the Disney feature, stars a Woody (mine) -- and several buzzes, for that matter.Prior to this month of sexual enlightenment, I had never used a sex toy . Nor did I have the desire to. To me, they were a threat -- a rubber substitute to my package (a classic battle of man vs. machine). I felt as though these ergonomic sex-machines would one day replace the man, rendering him sexually redundant; where he would be eternally banished to a world of solo masturbation, never able to procreate. However, it seems as though men are slowly beginning to embrace the idea of bringing products into the bedroom without feeling threatened, as detailed by a study by Trojan condoms . Nearly half (44%) of the men surveyed reported incorporating a sex toy in their lives; 10% having done so in the past month, 14% in the past year, and 20% using one over a year ago. Men who had more recently dabbled in sex toy usage noticed some serious benefits as well, reporting higher scores in sexual function, intercourse satisfaction, orgasmic function, and sexual desire. After reading this, it became clear that I was missing out.And The Journey Began…I would unwrap each delivery with the enthusiasm of a child on Christmas. After inquisitively inspecting each toy, I would read the instructions for proper usage. Then I would turn on each device and watch them work on their own. I’d smirk while doing so; the whole idea was both ridiculous and funny to me. This was a new experience that I still wasn’t entirely comfortable with. My next mission was to find a willing sexual partner for the experiment. Luckily I had met someone through a friend a few weeks prior with whom I had established a sexual relat 00000A72 ionship. She had a birthday coming up, and all she wanted from me was some no-strings-attached birthday sex, to which I immediately complied. It was her party, and we’d have sex if she wanted to, if you will. I told her about my sex-toy experiment and asked if she’d be interested in testing out some products with me. Guess what? She said yes.While out for her birthday, it didn’t take long for us to ditch the bar. After a few hours, we were itching to peel off each other’s clothes and have some fun, so we headed home – and I had my backpack of toys in hand.Once we got to her place, I revealed my newly acquired collection of toys. My heart pounded as I anticipated her reaction. She knew I'd brought them, but had no idea which products I’d received. The alcohol certainly helped ease my anxiety, but I was still nervous.To my surprise, she excitedly inspected the bag, turning a few of the toys on and off. After the inspection, she settled on the JimmyJane Form 2 . She thought it was cute -- and it actually is. It resembles a cartoonish bunny head (or molar -- but that’s far less sexy). Not intimidating at all. We were off to a good start. I grabbed the palm-sized device and used it as instructed. The tiny figurine struck her loins like a jackhammer. Within minutes, I noticed her legs tense up -- her body immediately reacted as I increased its vibration. The toy was relatively quiet. She was not. As we continued, I became more and more comfortable, but it was incremental.

Continue Reading

(More)
How To Dust Yourself Off And Try Again After A Tough Break
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

“The breakup hit me like a ton of bricks,” men will claim after the dissolution of a romantic relationship.Though the feelings are quite similar, claiming a breakup “hit like a ton of bricks” is an inaccurate analogy. Physical injury at the hands of bricks 000010FB isn’t a common occurrence, unless it’s a hazard of your occupation or you’re Wile E. Coyote.The unlucky individual never sees the ton of bricks coming, until it's too late, while most failed relationships are on the brink of collapse for a long time.The destruction of most relationships is a much slower process -- the bricks are removed one by one -- until the entire structure comes tumbling down.While it’s not always possible to prepare for a breakup, there are ways to soften the blow and manage the painful months that follow. Here are some tips to getting over an agonizing separation.Think It Through, But Don’t Obsess Over ItIt’s completely healthy, and natural, to replay the relationship repeatedly in your mind, but you should try to keep your emotions in check.“Thinking it through might mean understanding your role in the relationship and the breakup,” explains Dr. Susan K. Whitbourne, a professor of psychology at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, and author of the Psychology Today blog “Fulfillment at Any Age.” It might also mean that you try to get your emotions under control. When people go through a breakup, they let their emotions get out of control, and the process becomes much more painful and difficult.”Thinking back on the failed relationship always brings the finger of blame. You blame yourself. Or you blame the other person. But it’s not healthy to place all of the blame on one person or the other. If she were completely responsible for everything toxic in the relationship, wouldn’t you have been the person initiating the break-up?It’s important to think about what happened but, over time, it’s imperative that you stop dwelling on mistakes of the past and allow yourself to continue living your life, so you can have new emotional experiences and make new memories. 

Continue Reading

(More)
Why Being Single In December Is Actually A Good Thing
December 28, 2013 01:00 pm

While we're based in North America, AskMen has offices all over the world. When they produce awesome content of their own, sometimes we steal it. This article was originally published by AskMen UK -- so don't mind the repeated references to "pubs," "flats" and "gents," whatever those are. 

I LOVE Christmas. I love brandy butter and bread sauce and roast potatoes. I love a cold Boxing Day buffet. I love knackered family traditions that make no sense but would be sacrilege to break. I like churches and good cheer and the Frank Sinatra Christmas album. I like sitting with a highlighter pen and flicking through the Radio Times on 21 December , mapping out the following week. I like drinking an entire bottle of mint Baileys with my brother until we pass out on the sofa at around two am Boxing Day morning. I love buying presents. I take an entire day out and I dedicate it to Christmas cards. I am obsessed with David Bowie's duet with Bing Crosby. I know the Muppet Christmas Carol script off by heart. On particularly stressful days in high summer, I listened to Chris Rea's Driving Home For Christmas on repeat. Couples like to hog Christmas; they like to think its theirs, what with all their "checking in" at Winter Wonderland on Facebook and matching jumpers and 00001FFF Love f*cking Actually, a demented film with 50 flimsy narrative strands that tries to convince people that just about ANYTHING is better than being single, whether it's a cheating husband or a fiancée who doesn't speak the same language as you. Well, I've got some news, guys. It's NOT yours, Actually. Actually, it's ours. I'm sorry, but you get loads of festivities and Christmas is a brilliant holiday for us. It's the very best time of year to be single and here are the reasons why.Bloody mad datesDecember is the best month for dating. Firstly, there's a slightly Armageddon feeling about packing everything in before the year is over. People become obsessed with seeing each other or catching up "before Christmas" as if none of us are going to wake up on January 1st. Go to a club the Saturday night before Christmas and the stench of musk and pheromones is dizzying. They're all there to squeeze in one final hot fling before they get on a train to the arseendofnowhere-on-sea to spend a week with their family. I call this type of fling "The Christmas Special" and I urge you to commission one of your own this year. The mawkishness of Christmas also washes all of December in fairy-lit romance, making very ordinary dates feel really very magical . A few years ago I went on a date with a man who asked me to meet him under a giant Christmas tree in Covent Garden at the stroke of midnight. If a guy tried to pull this sort of charade off at any other time of year, I would have thought he was a class A, card-carrying nutter, but for some reason I found the whole thing enchanting, like we would be transported to the land of the sugar plum fairies. We weren't in the end, we just had a few beers, but it was good fun nonetheless. Not having to hang out with your partner's mates on New Year’s EveNew Year's Eve is terrible. Always will be. Terrifically expensive, and so often disappointing. They're particularly bad if you're in a relationship and forced to spend it with your partner and all their friends. No matter how nice they are, they're just not your mates and come midnight, you'll wish you were with your best friend, throwing each other around a bit and singing Auld Lang Syne. Single New Year's Eves with single friends are the best it's going to get. There's a fantastic camaraderie between you all -- that no matter how terrible the evening gets, you're in it together. You're going to tackle this dreadful night (and the following year) head-on, side-by-side.

Continue Reading

(More)
5 Easy Ways To Make Your Girlfriend Happy
November 28, 2013 01:00 pm

This was originally published on GalTime , our female friends who occasionally give us some much-needed tips. In this case, they trusted one of us (a man) to show the rest of us how it's done. Robert Manni is President of BrandEnable LLC, a marketing consultancy in New York City, and author of the novel The Guys’ Guys Guide To Love. Women are easy to please. What? I know, it’s not often we think that way but it’s true and, trust me, I’ve learned the hard way. Like most men, I used to view women as beautiful, exotic creatures that are unpredictable and impossible to figure out. I wasn’t doing the math. When guys don’t address the basics , women get complicated quickly. It’s all about the layers. Here are five simple ways for men to help keep their partners happy and their relationships on course, Guy’s Guy style. Share them, ladies, and you might see a change for the better. 1. Clean Up Your Act – Regardless of how tidy a woman may or may not be, she’s delighted when a man keeps his home, car, clothes and body squeaky clean and smelling good. Special attention is required for the refrigerator, sink, and especially the bathroom. She’ll notice. Keeping clean is a positive way to live and it will help guys score a check plus on the first date and beyond. It may also up his chances at her wanting to see if his sheets are clean, also. Once into a relationship, guys need to set the bar high. That means cleaning up around the house, taking out the garbage and vacuuming etc. It’s got to be done anyway and she’ll notice. 2. Be Proactive – If a woman has to keep drilling a guy about doing every little thing that’s expected, he’ll remain in her doghouse. It’s critical for men to take care of things on their own without having to be asked a million times. No one wants to be a nag, but she’ll seem like one if he doesn’t think ahead. Want to avoid “the talk”? Anticipate a woman’s needs and address them. Surprise her with flowers , reservations at a restaurant she’s mentioned, cook her a tasty meal, order tickets for that play she wanted to see, etc. It all comes down to…

Continue Reading

(More)
Does She Want You To Bring Something Extra To The Bedroom?
November 24, 2013 01:00 pm

One of the greatest things about being in a relationship is getting into that groove of sex where you are totally immersed in each other's pleasure. Sex is the No. 1 thing on the menu and both parties just want to do it all the time. It's a kind of honeymoon period and, depending on how you treat it, it can last a very long time. It's also the best time to explore your fantasies and test your boundaries, so we've compiled a list of our favorite couples' toys to enhance your sex life with your partner. Some nights call for toys, some don't -- but when they do, we want you and your girl to experience the best of the best for your play. Enjoy!We-Vibe 4 This horseshoe shaped couples' vibrator is the latest version of the We-Vibe (a product we have always trusted.) This redesign basically ups the intensity and control, while featuring a much sleeker fit. The We-Vibe is worn by her, but you get to enjoy the benefits too, as it stimulates her G-spot and clit. Plus, there are now three vibration modes -- low, medium and high-speed -- so switch it up and have some fun. %displayPrice% at %seller% LeLo IDA Couples Massager LeLo products never disappoint, especially with the ingenuity and simplicity of their design work, but the IDA is the first couples' massager from LeLo that rotates and vibrates while you and your partner are doing the same. Shaped to fit inside of her while you're there too, this toy stimulates all over without getting in the way. It’s remote-controlled, with eight stimulation modes (six standard, two motion-sensitive), 100% waterproof, rechargeable and made of silicone. Pretty classic. %displayPrice% at %seller% Jimmy Jane Original Afterglow Massage Oil Candle Remember when pouring hot wax on your skin would sting and then crust up? Yeah, we do too, but apparently, Jimmy Jane has found a way around that. The Original Afterglow Massage Oil Candle is a candle made from botanicals that melts down into an oil ready for massage and moisturizing. It comes in three scents meant to stimulate different senses (scent is strongly related to mood, after all). The oil is body-heat activated, so even though it seems like pouring hot wax straight from the wick to your partner’s skin could be slightly BDSM, with this candle, it isn't. Very cool product.%displayPrice% at %seller%

Continue Reading

(More)
Wait. Your Parents Are Doing What Now?
November 23, 2013 01:00 pm

It’s one of the most predictable commercials on television. A gorgeous, sexy white-haired couple is walking along a beach at sunset, everything serene and quiet but for the sound of the waves and the yapping of grandchildren. Sometimes the commercial is for a pension plan, sometimes for Viagra , but always it’s for grandparents: beautiful people who live for their grandkids. “Grandparents” has become one of those words, like “America” or “bipartisanship,” that's designed to jerk tears from the meanest banker. But having done extensive research on the current generation of grandparents, I’m here to say: It’s true about the beach. It’s just not true that they're there with the grandchildren. Today’s grandparents are mostly off partying like crazy instead of doing anything to deserve their cuddly teddy-bear image. The number of grandparents has been multiplying like rabbits lately. According to a MetLife analysis of census data, there are 65 million of them in the U.S. today, or 25 million more than in 1980. Rather than wizened stick-wielding figures slumped in armchairs, they are now more likely to be blonde cross-country skiers occasionally dispatching texts from some distant beach. Baby boomers have always lived well (after the “greatest generation” came the luckiest generation) and now they are prolonging their charmed lives into old age, though that’s not a term they ever use. Indeed, many of them refuse even to be called “Grandma,” let alone “Granny,” preferring instead some teen-style, gang-like nickname. And most of them are way too cool to hang out with grandchildren. With no help from grandparents, today’s parents are forced to spend their weekends cooped up in endless playdates with reasonably like-minded couples and their kids. At these events, moans about absent cavorting grandparents are the norm. Indeed, in my generation, grandparents are the only demographic category that prompts more complaints than children. One reason is that grandparents, annoyingly, still talk a good game about their grandkids. Probably knowing that it’s an asset in the geriatric dating game , they tend to go around noisily proclaiming their devotion to the offspring’s offspring. One grandma I know announced her intention to move to her son’s city to look after her impending grandchild full-time. However, as the birth approached she began to rethink her plans and compromised on one long weekend full-time. Even that plan was abandoned when the actual birth coincided with an unmissable party-house vacation. In the end, I do believe she looked in to say hi. The irritating thing is that the grandkids continue to adore the grandparents, even if they know each other chiefly from two-minute Skype calls during which the grandparents furtively check dating emails. In fact, the grandkids mostly prefer their grandparents to their actual parents. My generation left it so late to have kids that many of us probably won’t have to deal with having grandchildren at all. However, if I am still scuttling around the world at that age, I’ve told my kids in advance: I won’t be changing a single grandchild’s diaper. They’re on their own.

Continue Reading

(More)
The 10 Things She Wishes You Did In Bed
November 23, 2013 01:00 pm

If you think women don’t sit around fantasizing about very naughty things , think again. Women are experts when it comes to dreaming up the sauciest of fantasies, and they don’t bother limiting themselves to the traditional. The top 10 female sex fantasies cover everything from fetish to threesomes, and you may be surprised to know that many women want to do more than just fantasize. Some women spend just as much time hoping their men will help put their female sex fantasies into practice. Sound interesting? Read on: we'll give you the inside scoop on the top 10 female sex fantasies, and what she’s really daydreaming about when you least expect it. Domination (her dominating you) Women love a big strong man who can sweep them off their feet and carry them into the sunset -- but you may be surprised to learn that one of the top female sex fantasies is to have that same big strong man begging for sexual release in the bedroom. One of the top 10 female fantasies involves tying you down to a bed while she forces you to pleasure her with your tongue ; the entire scenario revolves around you worshipping her body and begging for her attention. Why? She gets to be in control while enjoying total devotion from her man in the process. What more could she want? Number 9 Domination (you dominating her) The advent of the metrosexual is most commonly blamed for this top 10 female sex fantasy. It seems that modern, independent women actually prefer real men who aren’t afraid to embrace their testosterone. This woman fantasizes about you pinning her down, thrusting her thighs apart with your knee and penetrating her as savagely as you possibly can. She wants to feel your fingers snake through her hair and pull her head back; she wants to feel your teeth on her shoulder; she wants to be owned -- if only while in the bedroom (after which, she’ll want a clear return to equality). This win-win female sex fantasy scenario allows her to fully indulge her femininity, while still espousing the merits of feminism. Number 8 Teacher/student You’ll be thrilled to know that the Britney Spears fantasy isn’t just for men: Women love the idea of dressing up like a schoolgirl and parading about for your viewing pleasure. Many would even like to take it a step further, playing the naughty tart who won’t stop teasing you until you pull her over your knee and give her the spanking she craves. That’s right: Loads and loads of grown women fantasize about getting a proper spanking from their man. A spanking from you is exciting for two reasons: not only does this mild show of dominance hurt so good, but it also usually leads straight into hot, hot sex. There are a few more role playing female sex fantasies you definitely don't want to miss...

Continue Reading

(More)
Revealed: The Worst Cities For Onlin 00001641 e Dating
November 23, 2013 01:00 pm

Whether you're happily single or frustratedly single, there is one question all single guys ask themselves at some point: Why am I single? There are countless reasons (fear, insecurity, not knowing how to approach women), and in our attempts to navigate through the fog we've undoubtedly tried online dating (or at least considered it). The results have varied, and now there's some interesting data that looks at the satisfaction of online daters in relation to the city they live in.

A study by dating website WhatsYourPrice.com revealed the worst cities for online dating. It polled 1,000 singles from U.S. cities with populations over 5,000 people and considered things like number of new messages per week and wait times for message responses to measure satisfaction. Drumroll, please: According to their results, the worst city for online dating is St. Louis, Mo.

St. Louis was followed on the list by Washington, D.C., Columbus, Ohio, Scottsdale, Ariz., Philadelphia, Pa., Milwaukee, Wis., Newark, N.J., San Bernardino, Calif., San Antonio, Texas, and Saint Paul, Minn.

The study in and of itself is interesting. It sort of begs the question: "What would my (online) dating life look like if I lived in another city?"

Continue Reading

(More)
How Soon Is Too Soon To Give Up Chasing A Girl?
November 15, 2013 01:00 pm

In my other line of work, I get questions from women constantly to the effect of, “How can I make this guy like me?” You might be thinking “Well, gosh, that’s dumb. Obviously you can’t ‘make’ someone like you any more than you can ‘make’ yourself into an NFL player.” If you think about it, though, it makes a little sense from their perspective. It’s typically the women who get pursued. They’re “liked” by the guys, and it’s up to them to accept or decline their advances. When the opposite happens, it’s understandable that they don’t know what to do. For a lot of women, it’s uncharted territory, and even for the ones who find it happening often, there’s not a lot of useful advice out there for them (mostly because in that situation, there’s no advice to be given, period). What’s funnier is that men have their own version of the same thing, only phrased differently. As men, we tend to come at it from the other angle and ask, “How do I know when to back off? ” In a way, it’s even less sensible than the female version. The women are at least being proactive and looking for a course of action they can take to make things turn out in their favor. On the other hand, men are basically asking at what precise point their pursuit becomes a waste of time, as though time spent courting a woman that doesn’t end in sex is an objective “waste.” We ask this question because we see our interactions with women as a linear process. Once we meet a woman we like, we expect that the more we “give,” the more we “get.” We show interest, she reciprocates. We spend resources on her, including time and money, and we expect further commitment and intimacy. We spend even further resources and finally make the overture of engagement, and we expect acceptance. When it works out that way, all is right with the world. We invest both physically and emotionally, and we get a return on it. Even when relationships don’t work out , it’s a case of one or both parties recognizing what they see as a bad investment. What baffles men is when things never get off the ground to start with. They’ll usually meet a woman, develop a small rapport, and then go about the courtship process. The problem is, they get stonewalled. The woman might find them pleasant enough as an acquaintance, but isn’t interested in dating. That’s when as men we’ll start to pour it in thicker and thicker. We’re conditioned to believe that investment equals rewards, so we figure that if we’re not getting enough output, we just need more input. That’s why you’ll see guys ask the same woman out time and time again, or lavish gifts on a woman who’s never so much as agreed to a date. They’ll keep going until they reach what they believe to be her threshold for “caving in,” not realizing that a woman’s acceptance of your investment is entirely contingent on her own investment in you.

Continue Reading

(More)
Are You Emb 00004000 arrassed By Your Turn-Ons?
November 15, 2013 01:00 pm

Loose Vagina?Dear Doc Chaves,I’m a girl, but I hope I can still write too. My boyfriend keeps saying I have a loose vagina and that’s why he can’t cum or sometimes not stay hard . Is that true? Is it me? We love the female questions at AskMen too, and thanks for reaching out. Yes, there is such a thing as having a tighter or looser vagina. However, it could also be sexual anxiety and performance anxiety your boyfriend is experiencing. It's difficult to say unless a thorough sex history is taken. It's possible, and likely, that his delayed ejaculation and erection difficulties are associated with anxiety. Other contributing factors can be relationship problems, insecurities, condom use desensitization, and stress. Far too often I've seen male clients have performance anxiety that skyrockets during penetration, affecting erection or inhibiting orgasm. Yet the same man is able to relax and enjoy orgasm with an erect penis during fellatio (oral), hand jobs or masturbation. My guess is the anxiety is the issue, not your vagina. But if you’d like to work on vaginal tightness, a natural way to do this is through Kegel exercises. I don't want to suggest or reinforce that you are the problem, but it's good for us to work on the things we have control over in relationships. Plus, Kegels are great for orgasm, incontinence and sexual health in general. I also encourage you to consider seeking a qualified sex therapist to help work on your mutual sexual concerns. Generally, sex therapy is more effective when issues are dealt with sooner rather than later. Here are two websites where prospective clients can seek psychotherapy professionals in their area: Psychology Today  and American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists . Humiliation PlayDear Doc,I have a small penis and have been self-conscious about it most of my life. It has affected me greatly with sex and dating. Recently, I got naked for the first time with a girl that I have been dating. I told her that I didn’t have a big penis right beforehand, I guess to prepare her, and she answered, “Well, let’s see if that little dick fits all the way down my throat.” It was so cool. I got so turned on, I immediately got hard. She noticed too and ever since then, I’ve been getting really excited and hard when she makes other comments about my penis size . The worse the comment is, the better. Why is this? I used to be so ashamed -- but now I’m turned on. SPH, or small penis humiliation, is a form of degradation play that uses eroticized shame for arousal. We often think of shame as a bad or negative feeling, but shame can have many different faces and elicit different responses within the body. For men, penis size is a touchy subject, and one filled with challenges to masculinity and confidence. In your case, SPH appears to empower. In certain contexts, especially in trusted, safe, secure environments, humiliation play that uses eroticized feelings can be incredibly arousing. Some use erotic shame as a way to empower themselves and challenge feelings of inadequacy. Penis size is one of those male sexuality topics where many feel powerless and insecure. SPH is a way to psychologically turn the tables from fear and insecurity to power and control. For those who are able to eroticize shame in this manner, it can be a wonderful addition to their sexual psyche. There is also an element of partner acceptance, which may add to your arousal. You told her something incredibly personal, filled with anxieties and fears of judgment or embarrassment. She learned one of your deepest, darkest secrets and she accepted you for who you are. When we think of inadequacy, it’s often rooted in lack of self-acceptance. My guess is her sexualization and eroticization of your penis has also helped you become more confident and accepting of your own body image and penis size. SPH may not be for everyone, but it sounds like it’s for you.

Continue Reading

(More)
Good Things Come In Small Packages
November 14, 2013 01:00 pm

You know how people always say, “it’s the little things that count”? Well, it’s true. Which is why stocking stuffers should not be overlooked. With the help of our Holiday Gift Guides , you may have gotten the women in your life jewelry, tablets, cameras, and other show stopping gifts, but you’re not out of the woods yet. Those little stockings that she slaved over and hung perfectly on the mantle are meant to be filled – and not with feet. While these tricky gifts have to fit in that tiny felt slipper and not outshine the Christmas gifts for your girlfriend under the tree, they still have to impress. To help you stuff her stockings without breaking bank or letting her down, we’ve picked out twenty gifts that are sure to please. In fact, some of them are so good, you might not have to get her anything else – but that’s probably not a good idea. Alex and Ani Bracelet Initial Charm BraceletThese Alex and Ani charm bracelets are huge among women right now. Whether she’s new to the trend or has already jumped on the bandwagon, these charm bracelets make perfect stocking stuffers because they are simple, small and stackable. The “initial” charm is the perfect one to start off her collection or to add to an existing stack of bracelets. The simple look of the recycled brass bangle will be a hit with any woman, while the dangling gold tone charm will add the perfect amount of customization to show her that she’s special to you.%displayPrice%at %seller% Marc Jacobs Rollerball Perfume SetSome women have a signature scent, others are a little more indecisive. Give the girlfriend or wife who changes her mind often this Limited Edition set of Marc Jacobs rollerball perfumes , featuring three of the designer’s most popular fragrances. Now she can pick and choose her scent depending on her mood, outfit or activity. Let’s just hope she doesn’t change her mind about you. %displayPrice%at %seller% Primitives by Kathy Cupcake Mason Jar CandleWomen love candles – why wouldn’t they? They fill the room with delicious scents and set the mood with the simple strike of a match. She will especially love this stylish candle that comes in a mason jar with a loving message written in chalk-art on the front. The scent of cupcakes will sweeten her up every time she lights it and, if you’re lucky, it might even inspire her to bake you some real ones. This is a great little gift for your mom or your girlfriend.%displayPrice%at %seller% Betsey Johnson WatchAdd a little bling to her wrist with this flashy Betsey Johnson watch . A great stocking stuffer for any woman, this watch adds just enough glam, while remaining a practical everyday accessory. This rose gold toned timepiece features a crystal bezel that will make her sparkle even more than she already does; the shimmery heart on the face of the watch will remind her of how much you love her.%displayPrice%at %seller%

Continue Reading

(More)
Revealed: The 49 Men Your Girlfriend Judges You By
November 13, 2013 01:00 pm

Continue Reading

(More)
Revealed: How Many Calories You Actually 00004000 Burn In The Bedroom
November 09, 2013 01:00 pm

Every lifestyle publication has, at some point, published an article about sex as exercise (the term "sexercise" speaks to how popular that concept has become in our culture). It's a fun proposition to justify sex, and more of it, as being beneficial to our health, but exactly how many calories are we burning between the sheets? According to this article on CNN , 30 minutes of sex burns between 85 to 100 calories. Well, guys, that sucks. A simple Google search reveals that there are about 105 calories in a banana. So, if all you burned off was part of your breakfast, that's pretty disappointing. To make matters worse, according to a study conducted by the New England Journal of Medicine, the average time sex lasts is six minutes (mmk, what?), which means you've only burned off one-fifth of that banana. The article suggests ways to optimize sexercise, like integrating yoga poses into your sex routine, but, come on -- no one's going to do that on a regular basis. So all of this is to say: Sex is great, but it's not to be taken seriously as a means of burning calories. Now we have the numbers to back it up.

Continue Reading

(More)
7 Kinky Things She Loves
But Won't Tell You

November 08, 2013 01:00 pm

Him: Nothing? Her: No. Nothing. Him: How come? I touched it like you told me to. Her: Well, what if you, um, bit it a little? Him: You mean like this…? Her: Ouch! Cut it out! Let’s just forget about it. Hit a sexual slump? Don’t worry, it happens. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, per se; it just means that you probably need to break out of your stale sex routine . Most women need more than a “wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am” approach to sex. They need excitement, passion, heat, and… kink? Some women, however, may be unsure how to approach the subject simply because “nice” girls aren’t supposed to like dirty sex . However, you’d be surprised how many of them do. Next time the two of you are lying in bed and you’re contemplating whether or not to fake a headache, try asking her if she might like “something different.” Here are seven kinky things your gal might be fantasizing about, but is probably too shy to tell you. 1- Masturbation Masturbation is a healthy part of life, so why not share it with your partner? If you’re not too shy, put your guard down and let her watch as you get acquainted with yourself. The whole voyeurism element has a certain mystique that might appeal to her. The big perk for you is that after she watches you please yourself, she might get a few new ideas or tips on how she can improve the way she pleases you. 2- Anal sex Anal sex is a century-old position, but it tends to have a negative stigma attached to it. This might be why some couples have yet to venture into this unknown territory, and why some women might be a little shy when it comes to suggesting it. You can start slowly by spooning -- the position in which you both lie on your sides, so that her back is facing you. This is a very slow and intimate way of starting, and it's crucial to making anal pleasurable for her. Once you’ve mastered this, you can graduate to full-fledged, passionate anal sex (you know, the kind you see in movies). 3- S&M; Is she a control freak? Then maybe she’d like to try a little S&M.; This is the practice by which you become submissive and let her boss you around with a few props, such as whips and handcuffs. It might get a little painful at times, so before the hot wax and nipple-pinching ritual begins, make sure you’ve established a code word, like “zebra” or "red light,” so she knows when to stop the action. You may be wondering, “What’s in it for me?” Well, you get to help her live out a lifelong fantasy, and you make her feel happy and secure in your relationship in the process. Plus, you get to see her in a hot leather outfit. Four more kinky things she loves but won't tell you after the jump...

Continue Reading

(More)
What To Get Your Girlfriend For The Holidays
November 08, 2013 01:00 pm

The time of year has once again come when men must open their hearts and wallets to express how much they love and care for their significant others. Whether you like it or not, you need to get your girl something, and, lucky for you, we've gone and done the legwork to find a range of gifts that will satisfy even the most fickle of femmes.But what if you've only been dating for two weeks -- should you get her jewelry? And if you've been together for over a year, how much money is enough to show her you love her?All these questions will soon be answered, as we took the liberty of compiling a list of gifts for different stages in a relationship . 1-3 months Flappers and Philosophers by F. Scott Fitzgerald Dating an aesthete with beauty and brains? This Penguin Classics black and gold Art Deco-inspired hardcover of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s short stories will win you points for both substance and style. $16.85 from Amazon.com .   La Dolce Vita Collector's Edition DVD

If dissecting the finer points of auteur cinema brings you two together, what better way to inspire some Roman-style hedonism than with Federico Fellini’s 1960 classic La Dolce Vita? $28.78. Buy it here.

 Mast Brothers Chocolate  With decadent flavors like fleur de sel, vanilla and smoke all wrapped up in art-paper prints straight out of a Wes Anderson set, these handmade dark chocolate bars will surely satisfy your gourmand girl. Five assorted bars, $40 at Mast Brothers . Veuve Clicquot Champagne  Simple, classic and, if you’re lucky, she’ll be willing to share. Bring some fancy glasses, get that fireplace going and dial up the winter romance with some elegant bubbly. $41.99. Get it here . 4-6 months NARS Monoi Body Glow II If you haven’t already whisked her off to an island paradise , Nars’ heavenly scented flower-filled Tahitian body oil will still leave her skin soft and glowing. Grab some candles and run a bath -- she’ll likely need an extra set of hands for those hard-to-reach places. $59. Buy it here . Riedel O For Two Cabernet Wine Set   Any woman with a bit of sophistication knows how to enjoy her fine wine. This five-piece decanter and wine tumbler set will surely be appreciated at your next double-date dinner party and even more when you open that second bottle for two. $99. Buy it here .  Tom Ford Black Orchid   Sophistication in a bottle. With notes of black gardenia, jasmine and incense, Tom Ford’s new classic will look just as good on her dresser as it will smell on her already alluring skin. Perfectly paired with a little black dress and dimly lit hotel bar . $120. Get it here . J. Crew Isabel Cashmere Sweater  Italian Cashmere? Yes, please. This navy pullover sweater will luxuriously swath even the most low-key of ladies. Perfect for her to relax in when you bring her that first morning coffee. $250. Net-a-porter.com

Continue Reading

(More)
20 Signs You're 00004000 Not Over Your Ex
November 06, 2013 01:00 pm

Continue Reading

(More)
Put On A Condom In Under 4 Seconds
November 05, 2013 01:00 pm

If you’ve ever had a moment like this , Pronto condoms may be the answer to your sexual prayers. The condoms, designed by Willem van Rensburg, and originally released in South Africa to prevent the spread of HIV, boast an application time of less than four seconds. A BBC article reported that after looking into the research on the AIDS problem in South Africa, van Rensburg concluded that many people were not using condoms largely because they found them difficult to use: “People find it's a passion-killer and they're willing to take their chances." The condom is designed with a plastic applicator that allows you to roll it on without touching the latex itself and the packaging has a corrugated seam that you crack open while holding onto either side of the plastic applicator. Not only is the speed a boon to the promotion of safe sex, the applicator also ensures that the condom is on properly, which can be a devastating cause of STIs for many. What more could you really ask for? If you lose the mood in the time it takes to get up and flick the light switch, there may be other factors to blame than finicky condom application. However, perhaps the rising rates of low-condom use are not just due to what some perceive as the “bother” of putting on a condom. At the end of the day, having sex with a condom feels like having sex with a condom. As Seth Rogen’s character in Knocked Up says when Katherine Heigl claims she thought he had a condom: “Did you think it was the thinnest condom on earth I had on? You think I'm an inventor? ‘He created a dick-skin condom, he hollowed out a penis and put it on,’ what the fuck?” For some, the answer to the myth of the dick-skin condom is the many brands of super-thin Japanese condoms available by mail order . It’s not quite a hollowed-out penis, but on second thought, maybe that's a good thing. Whatever your preferred condom style, whether it be speedy application or super-thin latex, nothing should be a big enough obstacle that it means forgoing safe sex. Even if it does mean you pull a Costanza now and again.

Continue Reading

(More)
How Your Facebook Friends Affect Your Relationship
November 01, 2013 01:00 pm

Facebook data is a goldmine of revelations into the structure and functioning of our social lives. The latest Facebook -related discovery offers potential answers to two great relationship questions: Should you date within your friend group? And can you tell if your relationship is destined to fail?

A study  published recently has introduced an algorithm that can predict an individual’s significant other based on the mutual friends they share on Facebook. The algorithm measures “dispersion,” the extent to which two people’s mutual friends are connected to one another. In a study of 1.3 million people, using dispersion to predict an individual’s partner performed best on the networks of married U.S. males, accurately predicting their spouse 76.9% of the time.Interestingly, the study, a collaborative effort between Jon Kleinberg, a computer scientist at Cornell University, and Lars Backstrom, a senior engineer at Facebook, came to the conclusion that couples with mutual friends who were widely dispersed over an array of social settings were more likely to stay together than those with mutual friends in just one social setting. The study refers to the former structure of mutual friends as “dispersed” and the latter as “embedded.”Here is an example of dispersion: Let’s say you're a lawyer who plays softball and is involved in theatre. Your partner may know a colleague from your work, a player from your softball team, and one of the actors from your theatre company, but your friends likely do not know each other. Those shared friends would be an example of highly dispersed mutual friends. Whereas, if you and your partner happen to be co-workers and share friends within the office who all know one another, those friends would be embedded mutual friends. The second type of scenario is the type of relationship the study found tends to fail more often.The research found that, over a 60-day period, couples who had declared that they were “in a relationship” on Facebook were more likely to break up if the structure of their mutual friends exhibited “embeddedness” rather than “dispersion.”At first glance, this study seems to support the “don’t date within your friend group” doctrine. However, embeddedness and dispersion are not mutually exclusive. Using the example mentioned earlier, it’s possible that you and your partner are co-workers and share many “embedded” mutual friends in one network, but also share “highly dispersed” mutual friends elsewhere. The findings do not condemn dating within a friend group, but rather support maintaining a varied social background while in a relationship. It's a modern framing of the classic directive: “Keep your independence.” Not only is maintaining a varied social background likely to make you a more independent and well-rounded person, it also enriches your partner’s social life by offering them a bridge to an assortment of diverse social networks. They, in turn, become a bridge themselves between those social worlds. The key here is to mix 'n' match. It’s when the relationship is rooted in one indistinguishable blob of mutual friends that it is 50% more likely to fail, the study says.So: Date your friends, date your co-workers and date your entire softball team! But make sure that if things go sour, you have plenty of other social safe havens to run to.

Continue Reading

(More)

  Best Sellers

SILVER BULLET (BULK)
Silver Bullet (bulk)
$5.67

JACK RABBIT
Jack Rabbit
$45.36
$19.99

UNIVERSAL TOY CLEANER
Universal Toy Cleaner
$6.41

BIG O VIBRATING RING REUSABLE
Big O Vibrating Ring Reusable
$9.74
$9.99

ASTROGLIDE 1OZ
Astroglide 1oz
$3.87

IMPULSE JACK RABBIT
Impulse Jack Rabbit
$72.18
$64.96

ASTROGEL 4 OZ TUBE
Astrogel 4 Oz Tube
$8.73

AWARD WINNING SEX SCENES -DVD
Award Winning Sex Scenes -dvd
$10.93

ANAL EASE CREAM 1.5 OZ.
Anal Ease Cream 1.5 Oz.
$11.14

STRAPLESS EXTENSION 9"
Strapless Extension 9"
$22.69
$20.42

BLONDE STARLET PERFECT PUSSY
Blonde Starlet Perfect Pussy
$24.74
$22.27

Sex Toys Home  |   Site Map  |   Shipping Policy  |   Return Policy  |   FAQ  |   Privacy & Security Policy  |   Terms of Use  |   Contact Us
Shopping Cart  |   Sign In  |   Track Order  |   Checkout


Join our affiliate program and make money




Copyright © 2004-2014 www.discreet-romance.com - Best online adult toys, sex toy store
All models are 18 years of age or older. 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record Keeping Requirements Compliance